Meal of the Week: Menethil Onion Rings

So if you remember back a whole week and a half, we made Green Bean Casserole. And the most important, most difficult part of that recipe was the fried onions. Why was it difficult? Was it because of the frying? No that was surprisingly easy. Was it because of the battering? I mean, I fucked it up, but no, not at all.

No no. The hardest part was not eating it all. Oh by the Light it was so good. And every few minutes I’d think “Oh just one more won’t hurt. There’s plenty. I have to make sure it’s not poison after all.”

And eventually, while (presumably) not poison, the fried onions became less for the recipe and more to sate your growing addiction.

Today we’re gonna feed that addiction.

Okay okay okay. I know it’s shitty for a fuckin’ Sin’dorei to make an addiction joke, but… Seriously guys! This is insane! And the best part? It really is easy…

Like I said before, I had a fear of frying things. Everything I’d tried to make previously had just turned out… ya know… charred and awful. So again, here’s the trick: Get a thermometer. Pryn, the darling, sweet, cherished woman that she is, recently got me a pretty nice instant-read thermometer that I’m going to play with on next week’s recipe. I guess Winterveil came early, but she said it was cuz she felt bad hearing me huff that my thermometer was taking too long.

So here is our cast of characters today! 1 pint (2 cups, 473 ml) buttermilk, one large onion, about a cup (125g) of flour. Not pictured: Enough oil to fry, I didn’t measure but it was about an inch deep. Also as an afterthought, I added the following seasonings: Garlic powder, salt, ground black pepper, ground orcish red flakes. I believe it was about a Tablespoon of each. I also stupidly added onion powder. There’s enough onions. You don’t have to add onion powder.

Cut the onions into rings, I made mine a little over a centimeter thick. I might make them a bit thicker next time, so use your preferences. Once the entire onion is cut, separate the rings from eachother, then soak them in the buttermilk for about 15 minutes. I stirred them about every 5 minutes but I’m not sure it needed it.

After that, move the flour into another bowl and add your seasonings. Here’s a visual of about how many I used. Experiment with it, there honestly isn’t a wrong way. Experiment fearlessly!

Mix this all together, and then in portions, add your buttermilked onion rings. You want to coat them all with flour, like so!

Do this to all of them until you have a healthy pile. Meanwhile, get your oil heating up. You want it to be around 350F/177C. The temp will come down when you add the rings, that’s okay. Just keep an eye on it and keep it within 10 degrees either way if you can.

Delicious babies ready for their hot oil treatment.

Add them slowly. It took about 5 batches for me to do this much. I may have been able to do it in 4 but I wanted to give them enough room to really cook.

Was that too spaced? Yeah probably. I’m new at this. If you’re reading this, you probably are too. If you wanna put more in, then go for it. I’m not a cop.

I mean. I guess I kinda am? I dunno, I’m a Knight Initiate and like, apparently the Watch is interested in me and — shit I’m not supposed to talk about that.

SPEAKING OF WATCH this is the onions right before I took them out. They went just a tiny bit too long I think but hnnnnngh they were so crispy and delicious.

Put them on a paper towel or clean bartowel to drain off the extra oil and sprinkle liberally with salt. They can take a lot of salt, don’t be afraid of the salt. Then let them cool. Yes really. Yes seriously. Trust me. Let them cool or you will hurt yourself.

Don’t hurt yourself.

Serve with a sammich or a burger or pretty much anything. Eat yourself into a food coma.