“Okay. Dog is walked and fed. Bar was not on fire when I left, which means that any fires that happen while I’m off aren’t my fault. So all that leaves is…
This.”
There’s a low sigh, the sound of fidgeting. Ten heartbeats of silence, the device only picking up the sounds of Oshu noisily eating, punctuated with the occasional possessive growl.
“Okay let’s do this.
So this one is kind of a one-off because… I mean, I didn’t make these. I assembled them, which, yes, I know hold your applause. But with all the special foods we’re making at the Keg to celebrate Brewfest, grinding my own sausages is just kinda not necessary!!
Delicious pork, fresh sesame buns, topped with all kinds of condiments. Come on down to the Golden Keg! I recommend the beer cheese and onions topping, though my personal fallback is always mustard and pickled veggies. Super good with a nice foamy ale.
When you’re too lazy to clean a dish….
Uh. So again… like… Food is new to me. I am literally starving, so living at a tavern with access to inexpensive food is a fucking Light-send. Near the Stockades (which I’m told are like… Handcuffs for your entire head that you have to stand in in public as punishment) are a bunch of food carts that set up every day.
Today’s meal are sausages from Ironforge, I’m told they’re ram meat. The sauce is something with a weird name I can’t pronounce, it’s a mix of soured white cream, cucumber and dill. Once I start learning how to ya know. Actually cook, I’ll get better at telling everyone else how to do it.
You like… mix about half a cucumber that’s been grated and squeezed, more dill than should be legal in your area, and sour cream. Then you let it chill. I think there’s also garlic, I dunno.
This cost me about half a silver, so I’m a fan. Plus with Braindigger, it’s real nice to always have my own plate!
Ok. Let’s you and me have a chat. Cooking is one thing, it’s like art. Sure you can use a references, you can follow someone else’s style exactly and that’s totally valid especially when you’re learning. But then you start to develop your own flair and you don’t have to use references anymore. Continue reading “Brewfest Special! Soft Pretzels”
Crunch crunch crunch “Ish it workin’? Yeah it’sh workin…”
Crunch crunch crunch.
“Okay, so like. I gotta put these nay-sayers to rest. And by ‘put to rest’ I mean bitch at the glow-box and by ‘nay-sayers’ I mean anyone who doubts my amazing culinary skills. Like Drex –” crunch crunch crunch “And Vali. Especially Vali.
So, see. The thing is, Vali is super jealous of my cooking genius. Because I figured it out. I figured out the perfect food. Wait for it…”
Crunch crunch crunch. Continue reading “Second Crystal”
I had a dream that I was in Dalaran and some mages were using me as proof that elves evolved from gnolls. I was so insulted I woke up.
When you have to make pepper eggs, waste not want not!
Fresh pepper egg soup with sage leaf garnish. Delicious and practical. Bone app the teeth.
…wait what? I’m supposed to explain how? …Uh…
Okay uh. So… Pepper eggs are made with like. Well. I use them for quick getaways, right? You take a small egg like from a bird or a dragon hawk, you use a dagger to poke a hole in both ends, and you blow the contents out into a bowl. Like. with your mouth. Literally blow it.
Then you finish with the pepper egg, using whatever you have on hand. The Golden Keg is near a blacksmithing station so I had access to flint AND gunpowder. These are really good eggs.
Anyhow, once you have the egg-snot in a bowl uh. Make it look pretty? I dunno, it’s really good protein, so pepper-egg restock day is usually my biggest food day. It’s amazing. It’s the best.
It’s not for everyone.
“Okay… is this working? I think it’s working. Hi! Oh. Wait you can’t see that. Uh. My name is Jax. Or Jack, apparently. Because I’m singular.
…whatever that means. Continue reading “First Crystal”
Hi. So. Uh, my name is Jaxkol Dawnsedge. Previously Shadowriot, previously-previously Shadowfel. I am a Ren’dorei living in Stormwind, nothing strange about me just a perfectly normal Ren’dorei, yup. Absolutely not a Sin’dorei hiding from someone in enemy territory. Nope.
Anyhow. I like to cook, among other things. I was telling Miss Katychla about that and she offered me this really… weird… journal thing. Said I would “making the betters use of it” than she was. So I guess that means you’re mine now, huh?
Don’t worry… I’ll take good care of you.
She said that sometimes books like this can talk back and… damn that just sounds cool as fel! So… I’m going to pick up where she left off. I’m going to document my best cooking recipes and my experiences around Azeroth.
I can’t wait to see what we do together…
Oh, right. And this is me!
Feed the Horde 