food – Feed the Horde

Boralus Brined Chicken Sandwich

Posted on September 6, 2019September 1, 2019 by Action Jaxkol

So one thing I’ve noticed in all my travels is that frying bird flesh is pretty universal, but there are so many different ways to actually do it. In Boralus, there’s an open air tavern that sells fried bird on a bun. It doesn’t sound exciting, but the second I bit into this, I knew it was something special. I couldn’t figure out what it was. The meat? The seasoning? A different kind of bird?

After the requisite two hours of buttering up, I asked the cook what made it so special. I asked if maybe it was seagull meat? He laughed and told me that there’s only one way to cook seagull:

Catch and pluck a seagull
Boil it for six hours in seawater
Dump the seawater and boil again in fresh water and milk
Dump the water/milk mix and boil again in salted ale
Throw the entire pot out, bird and all because you’ll never get that wretched stink back out again

Point taken. But, in exchange for being the butt of the joke, he did eventually part with the recipe.

Hint- it’s not seagull

Stormsong Valley Chicken Bacon Ranch Pasta Salad

Posted on August 31, 2019 by Action Jaxkol

Summer is finally starting to wind down! Finally. I don’t know about you, but it’s been as hot as Hellfire Peninsula in Stormwind lately. So of course, when you get out of the hot sun after working all day, you don’t want a hot meal. No no, you need something to help you cool down. That’s why I love a good, cold pasta salad.

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Meal of the Week, World of Warcraft

Easy Summer Salsa

Posted on August 11, 2019 by Action Jaxkol

Miss Jean, a druid and an avid gardener, got me hyped up last winter to try and grow my own veggies. I planted a few different types of tomato plants, some little cherry tomatoes, some big ol’ slicing tomatoes, and some felberries, which are sorta similar to tomato but they taste a bit like tingling.

At first it was great! Every day there were a few cherry tomatoes, or a felberry. And then all at once EVERYTHING came into season at the same time. I realized that even with cooking for the Keg, putting some in the chicken pasta salads (tune in next week!) a lot of these tomatoes were going to go bad if I didn’t figure something out. I’m not a fan of most tomato sauces (I know, I’m weird) but there is one thing I can’t get enough of.

Salsa.

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Meal of the Week, World of Warcraft

Darkspear Red Beans and Rice

Posted on July 10, 2019 by Action Jaxkol

You know a dish is ingrained in a culture when you ask how to make it any you get told that one — there is no recipe, you just inherently know how to do it and two — no not like that, move over let me show you.

Rice is easy to grow on the Echo Isles, and Trolls are known for their intense spices. When I approached my good friend Zan’juul and asked him how to make this, I had no idea it would be an ordeal. It turns out there are as many ways to make this as there are Troll tribes and my simply asking ‘how make the yum food’ was enough to spark a debate.

How do you know who to listen to? Whichever Troll looks most likely to eat you — that’s why you obey. I don’t make the rules.

for you are crunchy and good with sauce

Meal of the Week, World of Warcraft

Orgrimmar Lollipops

Posted on June 27, 2019June 25, 2019 by Action Jaxkol

Candy is dandy but meat is sweet! In Orgrimmar, lollipops mean two things. First, of course, is the delicious hard candy on a stick. But as one Orc guard pointed out to me, lollipops are you just flavoring your own spit as a snack. Charming. And now I can’t look at hard candy the same way.

The second kind of lollipop is a way of preparing poultry. By wedging the meat down towards the head of the bone, it gives you bare bone to hold onto and all the meat at one end for better access. Yes, this sounds simple enough — and it is — but it makes it pretty convenient, especially with the bigger cuts of meat like plainstrider.

But strider is a bit of a pain to wrestle with, so today we’re going to work with chicken!

Bukbuk

Meal of the Week, World of Warcraft

Mystery Meatloaf and Mashed Rutabaga

Posted on April 4, 2019April 3, 2019 by Action Jaxkol

Ya know, if you tell someone you don’t know where the meat came from, they won’t touch it with a ten foot lance. If you call it ‘Mystery Meat’, you can get some of the more adventurous ones to try it out.

But if you put it on a loaf…

…why exactly is it that people are so eager to eat things in a loaf? Someone smarter than me explain.

Loafin’ around

Meal of the Week, World of Warcraft

Meal of the Week: Love Sausage

Posted on February 14, 2019February 13, 2019 by Action Jaxkol

Ah, love is in the air. Or at least that’s what I’ve been told. I’m not exactly an authority on romance lately. What with my girlfriend having more and more trouble staying grounded in reality, the confusion and selfishness of finding someone to fill the void and the realization that now I’m not being fair to two people instead of just one. Or with trying to understand what you’re supposed to do when everyone has an opinion that they insist is the Correct one, but everyone’s opinion is equally Correct and vastly different.

But Love is in the air, and it’s everywhere, from the pink and red heart-shaped pastries and cookies that the bakers lay out with the dawn, to the heart decorations and pink candles that seem to be mandatory for every building to be dolled up with, or the couples holding hands and sneaking kisses and the questions it raises and the prickling fear in your chest what if you’re doing it wrong what if everything is wrong and you’re hurting everyone and maybe you shouldn’t ever have come to Stormwind in the first place.

But we’re not going to think about that.

Tonight we’re going to think about Love!

For just one day

Meal of the Week, World of Warcraft

Meal of the Week – Gorgrond Clam Chowder

Posted on January 17, 2019January 17, 2019 by Action Jaxkol

So I dunno if you guys have noticed, but it’s getting cold. Winterveil was pretty cold. Like, bundle up and stay in side watching the snow with someone you love cold. Like snuggle up in a blanket with hot cocoa cold. But First-Month?

First month is ‘it’s too cold to get out of bed to pee’ cold. Like, seriously considering the repercussions of not getting out from under the warm blankets ever. How long can you live without eating?

A while, but it’ll be worth getting up when there’s a hot bowl of Gorgrond Clam Chowder waiting for you.

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Meal of the Week, World of Warcraft

Meal of the Week: Ravager Dogs

Posted on January 10, 2019January 9, 2019 by Action Jaxkol

So two very important things: Don’t expect anything that comes with instructions from a Laughing Skull Orc to be easy. And don’t expect it to come out pretty. This week’s recipe was Ravager Dogs from a good friend of mine, Korgraath Crotchgore, and it comes all the way from Gorgrond. Don’t ask him the story behind that sirname. Just trust me.

These dogs were ugly as fel, but man did they taste good. Unfortunately Korgraath’s instructions left a lot to be desired, so hopefully I can help you learn from my mistakes for this delicious dog. Crunchy with just a little bit of spice and an interesting fresh flavor, these are definitely worth it. I hope to revisit it later with a better method once I’ve experimented a bit more.

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